The Tiny Dick that Gives Women Courage and Makes Light of Sexism
Ladies, if you’ve ever looked for a good way to feel better about your marginalized role in world society, look no further than Ms. Holly Wilson’s tiny handheld dick. This unique $150 bronze phallus is specially designed to shed a little laughter on things like rape culture, slavery, and unequal wages.
Alongside dimwitted allegations that a dick is the only thing separating us from our male counterparts, Wilson also writes:
There are negative voices in our society, our culture, maybe even your own family that can corrupt your inner monologue. If holding a small bronze dick and laughing at those voices, those fears helps you overcome them, then why not?
This is not a symbol; it is just a humorous talisman to remind us sexism is ridiculous.
In her Kickstarter project video (below), which funded the production of the first 100 dicks, Wilson describes the 1 and a 1/2 inch sculpture as a “little bit of courage” and a “little reminder” you can hold in your hand “that says you are equal, that you are worth it and that you should be treated fairly in all that you do every day.”
…right, because that’s exactly how every woman feels when holding a tiny dick in her hand.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but the only thing I can think of in relation to this little baby penis is just that — a god damned child — and I’m not quite sure how holding a child-sized penis in my hand is supposed to give me courage, let alone make me laugh and remind me of my equality as a woman.
Also, sorry to all you enslaved girls and women of just about any country in the world including the United States of A, but instead of donating to an organization like Equality Now that might actually be able to help you, we decided to give this jacknut $13,449 to kickstart her production of 100 tiny bronze dicks engineered to make women who hold them feel more equal while laughing at the ridiculousness of sexism. Don’t worry though, maybe we can fund another project with less expensive material like plastic so you too can have some tiny dicks of your own to hold on to while you engage in everyday activities like negotiating the $20 sale of your eldest daughter (who is probably around 12) to some disgusting creep who will rape and beat her for the rest of her sorry life. Maybe you’ll grab your child-sized dick like Holly does and have a little laugh at how ridiculous this whole sexual inequality situation really is.
But could a tiny dick be right for you?
Watch as Holly explains her reasoning behind this new, life-changing phenomenon.
I wonder why she made the thing small?
Share Your Thoughts
Do you carry a Tiny Dick around or do you plan to after this post? Do you think women should carry baby phalluses for extra courage? Could these things be used as a weapon of self defense?